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mermaidcamp

Keeping current in wellness, in and out of the water

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Ambiance Boutique, Oakmont, PA

August 31, 2013 — 4 Comments

I do not need to shop again for the rest of my life, but there are times that I am inspired to do so. While visiting my childhood home town of Oakmont, PA I found not only the inspiration, but also very high quality goods at rock bottom prices. Ambiance Boutique is run for the benefit of an organization called Bethlehem Haven.  The upscale consignment retail store carefully selects and curates a collection of very high-end clothing and household goods.  The system in place progressively discounts the item as it stays on the rack or shelf, so if it does not sell it becomes more affordable.  I went in out of curiosity and was hooked.  I scored such fabulous deals the first day, and was given a coupon for 10% off my next purchase.  When I returned with the coupon and found the 75% off rack the next day, they almost paid me to take two stylin’ blouses off their hands.  I thought I was done until I saw that black purse that was just too much of a bargain to leave on the mannequin.

If you live in Pittsburgh, and particularly if you have not been thrift shopping in the past, I urge you to go to Ambiance.  The store is elegant, the staff is much more professional than the other retail stores I visited here.  This is the kind of town where good customer service is reserved for people who live here, and the stranger is treated as an annoyance.    This will NOT happen in Ambiance. You will be greeted and served as if you are the most important shopper on earth.  Alexandra acts like a personal shopper at Nordstrom, but she is working for the betterment of homeless women in the Pittsburgh area.  If I were ever going to use the phrase win-win, it would be to convince you to try Ambiance.  Since I don’t use that phrase let me just encourage you to see if there might be something very special and very well priced in this store for you.  Tell them Pam sent you and you want to see the 75% off rack.

How I Became so Bossy

August 30, 2013 — 6 Comments

I was the youngest in all the groups in my childhood.  I was never considered for the key roles such as Davy Crockett, or his wife, when we dramatized that story. I would be lucky to be a horse. The kids in my immediate neighborhood just happened to be older. I played and hung out with a couple of girls who were in the class above me, but our games included the kids who were several years older. Every kid knows that the oldest person gets to choose first..at least that was the standard in our neighborhood.  Like all oppressed people, the youngest one just waits for the tables to turn, and they eventually do.

I know that I am bossy from my career as a fitness instructor; that is exactly what people are paying you to do..boss them around.  What I have never analyzed is the way my youth had an effect on my commanding nature.  I left my neighborhood and school to move to Venezuela where I was the daughter of the boss of all my friends’ parents.  He was even the boss of my teachers in school because the oil company hired the teachers and ran the school. Suddenly my relative underdog position was reversed in a big way.  Much older guys wanted to date me because that was culturally normal in South America.  Virtually everyone I knew sucked up to me with gifts and every privilege I could never have imagined.  I was the capitalist imperialist teenager with everything…and way more than anyone I knew in the states could have dreamed.  Servants, yacht, DC3 with private living room configuration and pilots who let me “land the plane” in Caracas……. I thought it was all just dandy.  I had a large sense of entitlement that came with the territory.

Once you have lived in another country the United States can never be the same.  Once you have been immersed in another culture, you can no longer stay completely within the old cultural bounds.  When I returned to life in the US I never lived east of the Mississippi or north of the line  (Mason/Dixon, that is) ever again.  There is something very powerful about being bilingual, but it is even more empowering to be bicultural.  My life developed from a tight and limited beginning to a progressively wider and higher view of the world.  I crossed more international borders before I was 15 than most Americans do in a lifetime.  I was fully fluent in colloquial Spanish, never missing a beat.  This short lesson in international diplomacy took place when I was 13-15; My confidence and self awareness significantly changed forever.  I took command.

I do not try to convince others to think like I do because I honestly appreciate diverse points of view.  I would not waste my persuasive talents to change anyone’s mind for any reason.  However, when any group lacks leadership I instinctively boss the group around…sort of like a sheepdog.  I sense the inertia and take the situation as a call to action.  Giving orders is an interesting experiment.  I find that people obey me, not so much because they respect my authority as because they know I am not going to stop…sort of like a sheepdog.  I see this model very clearly as I herd my elementary classmates into a video chat with each other.  I am sure that I did not have this nature as a young child, although I do want to ask my class if they remember me as a bossy kid.  I believe that I developed a certain ability to seek and destroy inertia.  We all know that in the end inertia wins, but my life is a symbolic effort to create action from inaction.  Some of us are simply born to herd.

Recipe for Nostalgia

August 29, 2013 — 8 Comments

Take one elementary school class, add 49 years.  Shake; don’t stir.  Meet in the building where you attended elementary school and Jr. high, and sip slowly.

I study history, but my own personal past has not been investigated.  I only have so much time to find all the facts about my ancestors, so biographical content has never crossed my mind.  This week I am digging into it.  I am on a quest to remember/discover my childhood, which was pretty idyllic.  I grew up walking a block and a half to my school, playing in giant gangs of kids in my neighborhood.  We went to swimming pools at country clubs in the summer, but we had a neighborhood of full time sports (wiffle ball) , games, dramatic productions, and parties..not unlike Spanky and Our Gang,  I looked at the hill in my old side yard where we went sledding.  It is much smaller that I could have imagined.. the entire yard has shrunk.  It doesn’t look like it would hold big games of red rover, but I know that it did.  I also had an archery target and a basketball backboard in the back yard.  The prop we used most often was the player piano.

Both my next door neighbors and our family had player pianos in the basement.  Our basement playroom was huge with the piano and a big bar.  My parents partied heavily down there.  Most of the time it was used for my piano practice or my play room.  My mom supplied a giant box of dress up clothing of all kinds behind the bar in the laundry room.  The kids would put on shows for each other, and sometimes for the parents, by dressing in the costumes and singing.  The parents sat down at a lower level in the yard, and we would enter from stage right, behind the house.  We had sort of an Ed Sullivan variety approach, with someone announcing the acts.  One of our favorites (and very popular with the adults) was “Heart of My Heart”.  We had a pantomime that was very corny.  We did it all the time, so I can still do it after more than 50 years.  I called my childhood neighbor, Peggy Jo, and sang it to her on the phone.  It made me cry because the song sums up the whole deal.  “Friends were dearer then”

Felix Hughes, Northern Ireland to Mississippi

August 28, 2013 — 8 Comments

Jefferson College

Jefferson College

Felix Hughes was born in Northern Ireland and died in Mississippi. He was a founder of Jefferson College in Washington, Mississippi, and became the first secretary of the institution.  He served in the upper house of the first territorial legislature in Mississippi.  His father-in-law was a Presbyterian minister, bad ass Revolutionary War hero.  They did mix politics and Presbyterianism, for sure.

Felix Hughes (1751 – 1824)
is my 4th great grandfather
Philip Oscar Hughes (1798 – 1845)
son of Felix Hughes
Sarah E Hughes (1829 – 1911)
daughter of Philip Oscar Hughes
Lucinda Jane Armer (1847 – 1939)
daughter of Sarah E Hughes
George Harvey Taylor (1884 – 1941)
son of Lucinda Jane Armer
Ruby Lee Taylor (1922 – 2008)
daughter of George Harvey Taylor
Pamela Morse
I am the daughter of Ruby Lee Taylor

He also was involved in another local school:

The Franklin Society
Founds
THE FRANKLIN ACADEMY

Jefferson County, Mississippi


FRANKLIN ACADEMY.   “This institution was founded by the Franklin society, named in honor of Doctor Benjamin Franklin, which had its first meeting at Greenville, after the adoption of a constitution, Jan. 4, 1806.  Cato West was president, Thomas Fitzpatrick, vice-president; Daniel Beasley, secretary; Thomas M. Green, treasurer.  Other original members were Thomas Hinds, Henry D. Downs, Robert Cox, John Shaw, John Hopkins, James S. Rollins, Charles B. Howell, David Snodgrass, Thomas and Joseph Calvit, William Thomas.”

“At a meeting June 14, Henry Green and Edward Turner were proposed as new members.  Mr. Hinds, chairman of the committee, reported that Edward Turner offered a house and lot in Greenville as a house of instruction for the Franklin Academy, at a rent of $100 a year if paid in advance, and the Rev. David Snodgrass offered to take charge of the academy for six months at $50 a month, “finding myself.”  At the next meeting, in August, Armstrong Ellis, Robert McCray, William Snodgrass and Feliz Hughes were made members.   The Turner proposition was accepted, Felix Hughes was chosen principal of the academy, and tuition was fixed as follows:  reading, writing and common arithmetic, $20 a year; higher branches, $30.” 

From:  Mississippi Vol. 1 A-K by Dunbar Rowland, 1907, page 742-743.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


From:  ACTS OF THE LEGISLATURE  The Historical Records Survey, Works Progress Administration, Abstrated for Genealogical Purposes page 19 by Ella McCaleb Young.

“Academis
(52) Founding members of the “Franklin Society”:
Cato West, Thomas M. Green, Thomas Fitzpatrick, John Shaw, Daniel Beasley, Charles Howell, William Snodgrass, David Snodgrass, Edward Turner, John Hopkins, Henry D. Downs, James Rollins,  Thomas Calvit, Robert Cox, Henry Green, Felix Hughes, Armstrong Ellis, Jacob Stampley, John Brooks, Thomas Hinds, Wm. Thomas & Robert McCray, January 8, 1807.”

Digital Personas and Delusion

August 27, 2013 — 4 Comments

bloom

bloom

The era of likes with mouse clicks has ushered in various forms of approval that may or may not be sincere.  Approval requires judgement and investigation.  False approval requires nothing but a click on a button.  This false world of endorse, like, share is the nightmare underlying quid pro quo SoMe relationships.  I know people on various platforms with whom I almost always agree, and others with whom I never agree.  This is not so different from daily social life.  Social clicks, clubs and groups in real life at least have the opportunity to see each other engage.  Some avatars and auto retweeters my be the social media equivalent of codependent.  They thrive on false acceptance and deliver the same to others.  They both spend and accept the fake currency of unfounded and insincere mutual praise.

Experience teaches us how to avoid being spammed or interrupted by endless chatter as we learn the ropes in social media.  I openly joke around with my social media image, freely admitting I edit out any content unflattering to me.  Everyone does; nobody uses a personal platform to highlight the worst in themselves.  In the past mad men produced media to sell to consumers.  Today we are all both the consumer and the media producers.  Much ado has been made about the commercial value of this new influence horizon.  I agree that consumers benefit form the vast array of information available to them today.  The social influence and digital bonds of personal branding may be insidiously damaging as well as lucrative.

The unintended consequences of the digital edited public persona create havoc with the self image and the soul.  Being fully present in a community or personal relationship is a high standard to keep.  Making basic decisions today about budgeting time and resources is generally stressful.  Conscious deliberate action will make the difference between finding a happy medium and wasting precious time creating delusions.  It is a brave new world. Caveat emptor.

Dog Days Officially End

August 27, 2013 — 1 Comment

cactus

cactus

This summer the dog membership at the Tucson Botanical Gardens has been a great benefit to our family.  Each Tuesday we enjoy walking early in the morning with other member dogs and their owners in a shady oasis in the middle of town.

cool morning walk

cool morning walk

Today is the last Tuesday of the dog membership.  It rained last night, which is magical here.  The garden was lovely and very fragrant for our last visit of the summer.  Artemisia has always liked to eat sunflowers, which is verboten in a botanical garden, of course.  As a treat and a little rule breaking on her last dog day I let her munch a couple of leaves on the bottom of a sunflower.  She didn’t eat very much.  She hopes to return next summer as a member dog.

I Endorse Marc Zazeela

August 26, 2013 — 3 Comments

My friend Marc and I met in discussions in Paul Castain’s Sales Playbook on LinkedIn about 3 years ago.  We started to tweet about the same time, and then joined Klout at the same time.  We followed some similar digital development paths, learning from friends and mentors along the way.  I invited him to my blogging tribe on Triberr; he accepted.  After a couple of years relating at a distance I finally met Marc in person last September at the TribeUp NYC event. We enjoyed a perfect pre-Sandy day in Manhattan meeting other digital buddies we had never seen in the flesh, and learning about blogging.

I have done business with Marc when I needed to ship my product to Australia and Israel.  He is prompt and professional with customers.  He treated my very small order as if it was the most important thing on his desk.  He has a full knowledge and capability to handle customs as well as shipping all over the world, at the very best price.  I enjoy his sense of humor.  He and I both hang out on twitter with other food enthusiasts at the hashtag #Mmgd. He is a jovial and intellectual friend in any discussion.  Lately we have been joking about the lack of integrity in LinkedIn endorsements.  I wanted to try this video endorsement format.  Marc was willing to help me figure out how to do it.  He is a good sport and a jolly good fellow to volunteer for the very first one.

Emiline P Nicholls, 3rd Great Grandmother

August 25, 2013 — 3 Comments

The grandmothers

The grandmothers

My 3rd great-grandmother was born in Somerset, PA in 1837.  She became the second wife of Thomas Peterson, a widower, in Ohio in 1855.  Her parents had moved from Pennsylvania to Ohio before 1850.  I know her father, Amos, was a teacher, but have no records of the schools, or the times.  After the Civil War she moved with her husband and children to Kansas to homestead. She survived Thomas by many years, and in 1920 was living at the home of her daughter, Harriet.  She is the short one on the right side of this photo.  The age of my Uncle Ernest on the left side tells us this was taken in Ladore, Kansas about 1918.

Emiline P Nicholls (1837 – )
is my 3rd great grandmother
Harriet Peterson (1856 – 1933)
daughter of Emiline P Nicholls
Sarah Helena Byrne (1878 – 1962)
daughter of Harriet Peterson
Olga Fern Scott (1897 – 1968)
daughter of Sarah Helena Byrne
Richard Arden Morse (1920 – 2004)
son of Olga Fern Scott
Pamela Morse
I am the daughter of Richard Arden Morse

Since both Emiline and her mother were born in Somerset I have joined the Somerset Historical Society and have engaged the services of the professional genealogists on the staff.  Next week I will have the chance to visit not only the place, but also have the fun of doing some fully professional investigation.  I expect to learn a lot about the history of the area and what was happening when my family lived there.  If I am lucky I will also find some information on Emiline’s husband, Thomas. Since I have been doing this research for so long I am excited to learn how the pros approach it.

Exorcist Archetype

August 24, 2013 — 5 Comments

What kind of power does an exorcist have?  Technically Catholic priests are in the business of exorcism, but in day to day life some people play the role of the exorcist to friends or family.  I personally do not have much experience with this archetype, but we all recently witnessed a bookkeeper in a school in Georgia display extraordinary ability to drain the evil out of a situation.  Antoinette Tuff  found the strength to talk down a deranged gunman with 500 rounds of ammunition.  Later in an interview she told the 911 dispatcher with whom she had been on the phone that she had been terrified.  She called the courage to act the grace of God.  I imagine that priest or not, it is always the grace of God that provides the purging of evil.  Do you have any experience with exorcist archetypes?

Memory Therapy

August 22, 2013 — 3 Comments

forsythia

forsythia

One week from today I will be visiting the town near Pittsburgh where I grew up and went to school through 8th grade.  I have not been there for almost 50 years, so things will be different…and yet the same.  I tune in to the daily tweets of @thomasmooreSoul because I find them to be just the right amount of therapy for a single day.  A long time ago he tweeted that talking about your childhood openly, telling stories you remember, is a great way to make sense of the past.  I have been exchanging pictures and comments with some of the former classmates for about 4 months now, as we prepare to meet in Oakmont, PA for their (I was already gone) high school reunion.  I can say that Tom’s advice about childhood stories is powerful.  Each one of us remembers different parts of our class  story;  I am sure being physically in our old school will spark some memories we have not discovered.  There is something unaltered about all our personalities that I can’t put into words, but next week maybe I will.

Before we all get hauled off to the memory wing of some care home we have the opportunity to get together to reminisce about our seriously good old days.  A few of us are already gone, naturally.  Such is life.  It ends.  I look forward to stirring up some memory/emotions from my childhood with the classmates with whom I shared them.  I have travelled the world, but this is time travel in a sense.  I am not sure what kind of deeper meaning will be revealed, but I expect it will be more helpful to my psyche than years of analysis might be  (I am too thrifty to find out).  Buckle up, gentle readers, and prepare to time travel with me to the ‘Burgh next week…back to the future.