mermaidcamp

mermaidcamp

Keeping current in wellness, in and out of the water

You can scroll the shelf using ← and → keys

Memory Bank

September 6, 2013 — 4 Comments

Sights, sounds and smells ignite memories.  There are strong connections of which we are unaware that link us to the past.  We are conditioned by both culture and anticipation.  If we remember (or think we recall) a season, an event,  or a place we create expectations.  I went to see my classmates last week in Pennsylvania to both test and fill my memory bank.  When I first arrived in the small town where I grew up I walked directly to my old home to jog my memory.   It did stir up both direct event recollection and a sense of the place.  It has not changed much.  I haven’t either.

You are what your deep, driving desrire is.

As your deep, driving desire is, so is your will.

As your will is, so is your deed.

As your deed is, so is your destiny.  – Brihadaranyaka Upanishad

Undeclared Wars

September 4, 2013 — 2 Comments

20130904-155221.jpg

If war is declared responsible parties will do the utmost to declare a truce. Since Viet Nam the United Stares has felt the need to wage war without any declaration. Since I was a teen I have worked to influence my peers and the government to stop violent political action, no matter what it is called. I have traveled and watched the reputation of Americans enter a downward spiral that can make it uncomfortable for us to be in other countries. Most people from outside our borders do understand that the people here do not have the same democratic power that we did it he distant past. They may not know the details, but they have heard about the corporate lobbyist and commercial contributions to our lawmakers that have turned democracy into a joke.

I vote and pay taxes, lots of taxes. I have marched on Washington for peace, where I paid for the tear gas that was hurled at me. My position has not changed:
War is not healthy for children and other living things. I don’t know how healthy we might be if we had not engaged in all these undeclared wars, but I feel pretty sure we would be wealthier. We are not the most powerful country in the world if we resort to force and violence without the dignity to declare the reasons, and the goals of the use of armed violence. We are viewed as mortally bankrupt by many around the world. How can we manage to control our resources for the benefit of our citizens? How can we stop the military from invading or bombing other countries without a declared war? They have established a precident, but this is a very good time to take a U turn. If we sacrifice young lives and national security, we need to announce to the world and to the ones who are about to be killed in the conflict what our agenda is. I do not believe our agenda is coherent; and declaration of war would at least reveal what the terms are.

Part of the Community

September 2, 2013 — 6 Comments

“Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart.” Confucius
Packing light is a good idea, but never leave your heart at home. To do justice to any travel experience an open mind and flexible attitude are both needed. You bring your culture with you, know it or not, and you either decide to break out of it and meet new ones, or not. It is now possible in the United States to stay in chain hotels, and eat in chain restaurants, shop in chain stores, and wear the exact same fashion to the point at all destinations can be reduced to a low and common denominator.

My trip to Pennsylvania was prompted by a reunion with old schoolmates. My curiosity was strong about the town where I grew up and went to school through 8th grade. I wanted to know how my old friends and classmates are now. The weekend was full of parties, visiting, and remembering our younger selves. I like the chance to be in different environments and see plants and architectural styles that are out of my normal range. Destination Oakmont, PA is almost the exact opposite of Tucson, AZ. Being present for leaves changing and the reunion parties has made this an exciting and fulfilling visit.

20130902-203425.jpg

How do you choose the places you will visit? Do you always go to places where you know people? AirBnB is a great way to be a guest in a community and be part of it. The agency facilitates on-line rentals of rooms, guest houses, apartments and more in private homes. I have stayed in a spacious clean home with kitchen privileges, coffee machine and private bathroom en suite. My host family is helpful and knowledgeable about the area. I was given some local history books to read upon arrival that were excellent. Staying in a neighborhood also gave me the perfect location. Our class reunion party was only a block from my place. I do like hotels for certain purposes, but the growth and popularity of airbnb shows the increasing interest in a new way of traveling. It offers a chance to take part in the life of the community more than a hotel can. Before your next trip, take a look at the available rental properties in the system. I believe you will be pleasantly surprised. I have been more than happy both times I have rented with the company.

Ambiance Boutique, Oakmont, PA

August 31, 2013 — 4 Comments

I do not need to shop again for the rest of my life, but there are times that I am inspired to do so. While visiting my childhood home town of Oakmont, PA I found not only the inspiration, but also very high quality goods at rock bottom prices. Ambiance Boutique is run for the benefit of an organization called Bethlehem Haven.  The upscale consignment retail store carefully selects and curates a collection of very high-end clothing and household goods.  The system in place progressively discounts the item as it stays on the rack or shelf, so if it does not sell it becomes more affordable.  I went in out of curiosity and was hooked.  I scored such fabulous deals the first day, and was given a coupon for 10% off my next purchase.  When I returned with the coupon and found the 75% off rack the next day, they almost paid me to take two stylin’ blouses off their hands.  I thought I was done until I saw that black purse that was just too much of a bargain to leave on the mannequin.

If you live in Pittsburgh, and particularly if you have not been thrift shopping in the past, I urge you to go to Ambiance.  The store is elegant, the staff is much more professional than the other retail stores I visited here.  This is the kind of town where good customer service is reserved for people who live here, and the stranger is treated as an annoyance.    This will NOT happen in Ambiance. You will be greeted and served as if you are the most important shopper on earth.  Alexandra acts like a personal shopper at Nordstrom, but she is working for the betterment of homeless women in the Pittsburgh area.  If I were ever going to use the phrase win-win, it would be to convince you to try Ambiance.  Since I don’t use that phrase let me just encourage you to see if there might be something very special and very well priced in this store for you.  Tell them Pam sent you and you want to see the 75% off rack.

How I Became so Bossy

August 30, 2013 — 6 Comments

I was the youngest in all the groups in my childhood.  I was never considered for the key roles such as Davy Crockett, or his wife, when we dramatized that story. I would be lucky to be a horse. The kids in my immediate neighborhood just happened to be older. I played and hung out with a couple of girls who were in the class above me, but our games included the kids who were several years older. Every kid knows that the oldest person gets to choose first..at least that was the standard in our neighborhood.  Like all oppressed people, the youngest one just waits for the tables to turn, and they eventually do.

I know that I am bossy from my career as a fitness instructor; that is exactly what people are paying you to do..boss them around.  What I have never analyzed is the way my youth had an effect on my commanding nature.  I left my neighborhood and school to move to Venezuela where I was the daughter of the boss of all my friends’ parents.  He was even the boss of my teachers in school because the oil company hired the teachers and ran the school. Suddenly my relative underdog position was reversed in a big way.  Much older guys wanted to date me because that was culturally normal in South America.  Virtually everyone I knew sucked up to me with gifts and every privilege I could never have imagined.  I was the capitalist imperialist teenager with everything…and way more than anyone I knew in the states could have dreamed.  Servants, yacht, DC3 with private living room configuration and pilots who let me “land the plane” in Caracas……. I thought it was all just dandy.  I had a large sense of entitlement that came with the territory.

Once you have lived in another country the United States can never be the same.  Once you have been immersed in another culture, you can no longer stay completely within the old cultural bounds.  When I returned to life in the US I never lived east of the Mississippi or north of the line  (Mason/Dixon, that is) ever again.  There is something very powerful about being bilingual, but it is even more empowering to be bicultural.  My life developed from a tight and limited beginning to a progressively wider and higher view of the world.  I crossed more international borders before I was 15 than most Americans do in a lifetime.  I was fully fluent in colloquial Spanish, never missing a beat.  This short lesson in international diplomacy took place when I was 13-15; My confidence and self awareness significantly changed forever.  I took command.

I do not try to convince others to think like I do because I honestly appreciate diverse points of view.  I would not waste my persuasive talents to change anyone’s mind for any reason.  However, when any group lacks leadership I instinctively boss the group around…sort of like a sheepdog.  I sense the inertia and take the situation as a call to action.  Giving orders is an interesting experiment.  I find that people obey me, not so much because they respect my authority as because they know I am not going to stop…sort of like a sheepdog.  I see this model very clearly as I herd my elementary classmates into a video chat with each other.  I am sure that I did not have this nature as a young child, although I do want to ask my class if they remember me as a bossy kid.  I believe that I developed a certain ability to seek and destroy inertia.  We all know that in the end inertia wins, but my life is a symbolic effort to create action from inaction.  Some of us are simply born to herd.

Recipe for Nostalgia

August 29, 2013 — 8 Comments

Take one elementary school class, add 49 years.  Shake; don’t stir.  Meet in the building where you attended elementary school and Jr. high, and sip slowly.

I study history, but my own personal past has not been investigated.  I only have so much time to find all the facts about my ancestors, so biographical content has never crossed my mind.  This week I am digging into it.  I am on a quest to remember/discover my childhood, which was pretty idyllic.  I grew up walking a block and a half to my school, playing in giant gangs of kids in my neighborhood.  We went to swimming pools at country clubs in the summer, but we had a neighborhood of full time sports (wiffle ball) , games, dramatic productions, and parties..not unlike Spanky and Our Gang,  I looked at the hill in my old side yard where we went sledding.  It is much smaller that I could have imagined.. the entire yard has shrunk.  It doesn’t look like it would hold big games of red rover, but I know that it did.  I also had an archery target and a basketball backboard in the back yard.  The prop we used most often was the player piano.

Both my next door neighbors and our family had player pianos in the basement.  Our basement playroom was huge with the piano and a big bar.  My parents partied heavily down there.  Most of the time it was used for my piano practice or my play room.  My mom supplied a giant box of dress up clothing of all kinds behind the bar in the laundry room.  The kids would put on shows for each other, and sometimes for the parents, by dressing in the costumes and singing.  The parents sat down at a lower level in the yard, and we would enter from stage right, behind the house.  We had sort of an Ed Sullivan variety approach, with someone announcing the acts.  One of our favorites (and very popular with the adults) was “Heart of My Heart”.  We had a pantomime that was very corny.  We did it all the time, so I can still do it after more than 50 years.  I called my childhood neighbor, Peggy Jo, and sang it to her on the phone.  It made me cry because the song sums up the whole deal.  “Friends were dearer then”

Digital Personas and Delusion

August 27, 2013 — 4 Comments

bloom

bloom

The era of likes with mouse clicks has ushered in various forms of approval that may or may not be sincere.  Approval requires judgement and investigation.  False approval requires nothing but a click on a button.  This false world of endorse, like, share is the nightmare underlying quid pro quo SoMe relationships.  I know people on various platforms with whom I almost always agree, and others with whom I never agree.  This is not so different from daily social life.  Social clicks, clubs and groups in real life at least have the opportunity to see each other engage.  Some avatars and auto retweeters my be the social media equivalent of codependent.  They thrive on false acceptance and deliver the same to others.  They both spend and accept the fake currency of unfounded and insincere mutual praise.

Experience teaches us how to avoid being spammed or interrupted by endless chatter as we learn the ropes in social media.  I openly joke around with my social media image, freely admitting I edit out any content unflattering to me.  Everyone does; nobody uses a personal platform to highlight the worst in themselves.  In the past mad men produced media to sell to consumers.  Today we are all both the consumer and the media producers.  Much ado has been made about the commercial value of this new influence horizon.  I agree that consumers benefit form the vast array of information available to them today.  The social influence and digital bonds of personal branding may be insidiously damaging as well as lucrative.

The unintended consequences of the digital edited public persona create havoc with the self image and the soul.  Being fully present in a community or personal relationship is a high standard to keep.  Making basic decisions today about budgeting time and resources is generally stressful.  Conscious deliberate action will make the difference between finding a happy medium and wasting precious time creating delusions.  It is a brave new world. Caveat emptor.

Dog Days Officially End

August 27, 2013 — 1 Comment

cactus

cactus

This summer the dog membership at the Tucson Botanical Gardens has been a great benefit to our family.  Each Tuesday we enjoy walking early in the morning with other member dogs and their owners in a shady oasis in the middle of town.

cool morning walk

cool morning walk

Today is the last Tuesday of the dog membership.  It rained last night, which is magical here.  The garden was lovely and very fragrant for our last visit of the summer.  Artemisia has always liked to eat sunflowers, which is verboten in a botanical garden, of course.  As a treat and a little rule breaking on her last dog day I let her munch a couple of leaves on the bottom of a sunflower.  She didn’t eat very much.  She hopes to return next summer as a member dog.

Emiline P Nicholls, 3rd Great Grandmother

August 25, 2013 — 3 Comments

The grandmothers

The grandmothers

My 3rd great-grandmother was born in Somerset, PA in 1837.  She became the second wife of Thomas Peterson, a widower, in Ohio in 1855.  Her parents had moved from Pennsylvania to Ohio before 1850.  I know her father, Amos, was a teacher, but have no records of the schools, or the times.  After the Civil War she moved with her husband and children to Kansas to homestead. She survived Thomas by many years, and in 1920 was living at the home of her daughter, Harriet.  She is the short one on the right side of this photo.  The age of my Uncle Ernest on the left side tells us this was taken in Ladore, Kansas about 1918.

Emiline P Nicholls (1837 – )
is my 3rd great grandmother
Harriet Peterson (1856 – 1933)
daughter of Emiline P Nicholls
Sarah Helena Byrne (1878 – 1962)
daughter of Harriet Peterson
Olga Fern Scott (1897 – 1968)
daughter of Sarah Helena Byrne
Richard Arden Morse (1920 – 2004)
son of Olga Fern Scott
Pamela Morse
I am the daughter of Richard Arden Morse

Since both Emiline and her mother were born in Somerset I have joined the Somerset Historical Society and have engaged the services of the professional genealogists on the staff.  Next week I will have the chance to visit not only the place, but also have the fun of doing some fully professional investigation.  I expect to learn a lot about the history of the area and what was happening when my family lived there.  If I am lucky I will also find some information on Emiline’s husband, Thomas. Since I have been doing this research for so long I am excited to learn how the pros approach it.

Exorcist Archetype

August 24, 2013 — 5 Comments

What kind of power does an exorcist have?  Technically Catholic priests are in the business of exorcism, but in day to day life some people play the role of the exorcist to friends or family.  I personally do not have much experience with this archetype, but we all recently witnessed a bookkeeper in a school in Georgia display extraordinary ability to drain the evil out of a situation.  Antoinette Tuff  found the strength to talk down a deranged gunman with 500 rounds of ammunition.  Later in an interview she told the 911 dispatcher with whom she had been on the phone that she had been terrified.  She called the courage to act the grace of God.  I imagine that priest or not, it is always the grace of God that provides the purging of evil.  Do you have any experience with exorcist archetypes?